As beautiful as the name.

Every parent will give their child a beautiful name.
So every time someone calls their child , their hope is so that it became a prayer.
And one day, the child would turn out just like how they hope to.
I was given the name of the first women who died as a syahid.
MasyaAllah,she fought for the name of Islam and for her beliefs.
Her family was tortured right in front of her eyes.
They were released inside a boiling bath and fried alive, and she was forced to witness everything.
By they stand by they grounds to Jihad Fi Sabilillah.
She is Sumayyah Ummu Ammar Bin Yassir.
I was honoured to be gifted with her name.
I am not qualified to earned such a wonderful and strong women's name.
I am just a mere teenager trying to find her part in life and still controlled by the lust that cease in this world.
I wanna have an akhlak as beautiful as Sumayyah, the person I was named after.
I wanna be as beautiful as my name.
And I am still striving.

Dreamcatchin

Before here,everything looks so clear.
Almost everything, looks too clear.
But when shit got real, it really aint the same.
The freedom and goals becomes my curse.
Eating me from inside, while my heart is still alive.
I don't wanna be me right now but at the same time i wanna be me.
But the problem is who am i?
Stuck between choices is the most mind taxing thing.
I don't miss home that much, i miss myself.
I don't think searching fr answers is that hard, searchin for myself is more difficult.
My goals, my future, my vision, my dreams. 😟