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| its might be the end of 2013, but there's more to come in 2014. |
Hey, it’s been like 6 months since I’ve updated this blog. I
guess, I just don’t have the time or the ‘feel’to write. But I’ve never stopped
writing actually. It’s just that I enjoyed writing by hand more than typing.
Well, enough of that blabbering, the reason I write this post is because , well
2014 is coming babe! I would be lying if I said I’m not nervous and anxious.
Well, actually, im critically am. But im determined and looking forward to this
year. It’s just that, it would be my last year of actually studying in school.
It’s spm im gonna face next year. It’s gonna be one of my life BIGGEST turning
point. Who knows where I’ll end up after that. I guess I just have to make the
best out of it. And right now, I had choices. Choices that I have to make.
Yeah, in life we had always have choices. It’s either we realize it or not that
makes a difference. It’s not fate that have led us to where we are now , it’s
the choices we made. It’s heartbreaking to see people blame things around them
for their on faults . I know I have done that too. But, there’s no use crying
over spilt milk. Never regret, if it’s good it’s wonderful. If it’s bad, it’s
experience. I’ve been holding on to that since the incident. And right now, I choose
to study diligently, make my parents proud and follow my sisters footsteps. I
have to get excellent results. NO, I need to. And the fact that all my sisters
are studying overseas make the spark in me turn into flames. I have goals to
achieve. An im gonna try my hardest to turn it into reality. If I alreay tried
my best, but I didn’t get what I want, at least I don’t regret. It’s just
because Allah had better plans for me. I’m preparing my heart for things to
come in 2014, it’s gonna be a bumpy ride, and I know it’s gonna take forever fo
me to be FULLY READY but at least I know what to expect. I know I have to step
up my game coz my friends are far ahead of me. but it's not too late to catch up with em.
Well, this is gonna be my last post for 2013. And the end
year holidays without any of my sisters is a total bummer. It’s my first long holidays without ANY of em, as far as I remembered. And it’s because they were at other parts of
the world, and to be honest I actually, miss them. Not that I don’t enjoy the
quality time with my parents. It was fun actually. But I guess, its… different.
They were very understanding actually. They let me went out with my friends and
go to camp. Furthermore, all the weddings kept my mind off things. My holiday
was spent with, me and my parents went to weddings to catching up with my
friends, to having a heated up discussion about issues which has no point of
arguing with my parents or just watching them doing that, to a whole lot of
wattpad, what can u say, im addicted to it *sigh*, to doing
my piles homework which I never get to finish at the last minute. This holiday,
the lessons I’ve learnt is that, family is home. I don’t care if it’s KL, or N.
Sembilan or anywhere, I came to realize that, if we’re all together, that’s where
I belong. I’m truly grateful I have a big one. So that, if there is anybody’s
missing, it’ll let u take things off ur mind, because was always occupied by
other family members. Yeah, I don’t interact much with my bigger family *yeah,
im the socially awkward type when im with my ‘em*, but just watching them
having fun and comfortable around each other makes me happy., During this
holiday too, I unravel some secrets about the family, and I hope things work
out between ‘em. I also know that I need to change, yeah I know ive said that for
a few times already, and u may think im all talk and no actions but its hard you know. To adapt to new situations each time. You might
think im someone who doesn’t have a stand. But I know, if changing makes you a
better person, why not?
This post is getting longer, and longer and I need to stop.
I’m going back to superb today, a day early to carry my responsibilities as a
prefect. Yeah, it’s hard, at one point I just want to gave everything up ya
know. To be a student, a prefect and a friend at the same time. But im sure
people choose me to carry this responsibility because they believe I can do it.
Allah knows I can do it. Because He never test a person beyond the person’s
abilities. Now, all I need is to trust myself. I can carry my responsibility to
make up what I had done in my former school. And this gave me a chance to know
my priorities. I just want to do my best in this. I’ve already had a list of
new year’s resolution this year in my head. And maybe at the end of 2014, i'll tell u what
it is and have I achieved it or not., I want to do my best in 2014. And I’ll
pray hard that I can live up to that.If Allah wills it, im sure with hard work
and prayers, I’d make it. Please wish me the best of luck, please give me full
support in my decisions, please guide me if Im starting to stray away and
please pray for me. I need all the support I can from the people around me. And
I wish the best of luck for all of y’all out there for 2014. Thank you for the
memories in 2013 and a BIG sorry if I had done anything wong to any one of u
who is reading this. ;)
